


The Fear of Losing You

by exuberant_imperfection, kate882



Series: KNB Hogwarts AUs [3]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Fluff and Angst, Kagami is a good friend, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-17
Updated: 2015-07-17
Packaged: 2018-04-09 19:11:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4360928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exuberant_imperfection/pseuds/exuberant_imperfection, https://archiveofourown.org/users/kate882/pseuds/kate882
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are a few bad experiences with Boggarts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Fear of Losing You

Aomine had been drifting away from him more and more. He’d noticed the Slytherin getting better at Quidditch. Everyone had. It was hard not to when he kept on catching the Snitch before anyone even scored a goal. Last time he had ended the game in less than a minute.

Kuroko had been waiting for Aomine outside of the Quidditch pitch like he usually did. It was Slytherin’s practice time, which was usually right before dinner, so they would walk to the Great Hall together.

Practice was boring. No one bothered to tell Aomine to do any training, not even the captain, because he didn’t need it. And if he practiced with the rest of the team, he’d just fly circles around all of them and it wouldn’t be beneficial to either Aomine or anyone else. He lasted maybe an hour into that day’s practice, his frustration building up until finally, he couldn’t take it anymore.

“Oh come ON!” he shouted as one of their newest Chasers failed yet again to get by him. “I’m not even a Keeper! I’m the goddamn Seeker and you still can’t score on me?”

“I-I’m sorry! I just started this,” the Chaser defended himself.

“Yeah,” said another Chaser, coming to the other’s defense. “You’re just too good, how can you expect anyone to be able to train with you if you can’t hold back a little?”

That had Aomine seeing red. He couldn’t think straight enough to respond properly. Instead he threw down his broomstick, yelled, “That’s IT! I’m fucking DONE,” and stormed off of the pitch.

“Aom-” Kuroko cut off as he saw the look on Aomine’s face. “Are you okay?”

Blinded by rage, Aomine almost blew right past Kuroko, but then heard him speak and jumped. “FUCKIN -- ” he yelped in surprise, then took a deep breath and Kuroko’s words registered in his brain. “Yeah. Fine. I’m hungry. Let’s go eat,” he said, his voice clipped and his tone monotonous. He continued walking towards the castle without checking to see if Kuroko was following him.

“But . . . your practice isn’t over for another ten minutes,” Kuroko said with a frown, having to jog a little to keep up.

Aomine was still pissed, but he really didn’t want to blow up at Kuroko, so he answered shortly, “Yep,” and hoped maybe he’d take a hint and change the subject.

Kuroko opened his mouth to continue questioning him, but decided against it at the last second. “Did you hear that Kise-kun and Kasamatsu-kun were caught in the room of requirements? And in a rather compromising position as well,” he said to change the subject.

Aomine smiled a little in spite of himself and accepted the new topic gratefully. Things went back to normal as he and Kuroko ate dinner in the Great Hall, none of the Gryffindors even giving them a weird look anymore for him being a Slytherin sitting at their table. He could almost pretend that nothing had happened.

But later, when they went outside to sit under their favorite tree and watch the stars come out, a companionable silence settled between them, and Aomine’s mind began to wander. His mood darkened. “I’m not gonna go to practice anymore,” he said as he recalled the day’s events.

Kuroko’s eyes snapped over to Aomine at that, and he frowned at him. “What do you mean you’re not going to practice? You’re on the team, you can’t be on the team and not go to practice.”

Aomine crossed his arms and pointedly didn’t look at Kuroko, even though he could feel his gaze on him. “What’s the point? I don’t need it. And I’m no good at helping anyone else train, either.”

“You helped me train, even though we’re on different teams, and now I can actually play decently, so that’s not true,” Kuroko said.

“And games, too,” Aomine continued, as if Kuroko hadn’t said anything. “Why should I bother playing when literally everyone would be happier if I didn’t? Including myself.” He sighed. “I might as well just quit.”

Kuroko struggled to come up with a way to respond, but if Aomine thought he would be happier not playing how could he tell him that he should? Aomine didn’t seem happy as it was now though either, which left Kuroko at a bit of a loss.

Aomine tried to be relieved at the lack of argument, but he found the silence was more discouraging than anything. Neither of them said anything until it was almost too dark to see, and they went back inside.

* * *

“Send the next person in,” the Defense Against the Dark Arts professor instructed Kagami when his exam was finished. (He sighed in deep relief at the sight of Kagami’s back -- he felt lucky to have all of his limbs intact after enduring such dangerous ineptitude.)

Kagami left the professor’s office. “Your turn, Kuroko. Good luck.”

“Thank you, Kagami-kun,” Kuroko replied with a small smile before walking inside.

The professor smiled pleasantly as he began Kuroko’s exam. While not the most talented wizard his age, Kuroko generally knew what he was doing, and it made the professor’s job easier. They made it all the way to the last part of the exam without a hitch.

“Alright, Kuroko-kun,” the professor said, walking over to a nearby wardrobe. “Lastly, I’m going to release this Boggart. Show me how to properly deal with it. Are you ready?”

Kuroko honestly wasn’t sure what his Boggart would be. He couldn’t really think of anything that scared him considerably more than anything else did, so he nodded at the professor and readied his wand.

The professor unlatched the doors, then stepped back, holding his own wand at the ready just in case anything went wrong.

Kuroko’s brows furrowed in confusion when he saw Aomine step out of the wardrobe. He wasn’t afraid of Aomine. Why -- and then Aomine was looking at him with such pain in his eyes and turning his back on him and Kuroko understood. He wasn’t afraid of Aomine. He was afraid of losing him. Which, with the way things were going between them, seemed like a likely enough possibility. It took a lot of effort to try and make something funny out of it, and the laughter he used was very clearly forced.  

There was a brief moment in which the professor thought he might have to step in, but Kuroko managed to disarm the Boggart, and he locked it back up in the wardrobe. “Well…” the professor began, almost wanting to ask if everything was alright -- the boy seemed shaken. But he decided against it. “Well done, Kuroko-kun. You’re all set; please send the next person in on your way out.”

Kuroko nodded and left, informing Riko it was her turn as he quickly made his way down the hall, wanting to put as much distance between himself and that classroom, and maybe see if he couldn’t find Aomine.

It was the very next day that Aomine set a new record -- catching the Snitch in less than twenty seconds, even though it was raining -- and left the field in a numb rage.

“Aomine-kun?” Kuroko was getting used to seeing Aomine leave practice early, but the expression on his face was different today.

Aomine considered just walking by him, but hearing Kuroko’s voice made him remember all the things Kuroko had ever said to convince him not to quit before this. He clenched his fists. “You were wrong,” he said, facing Kuroko but not looking at him. His voice was only just loud enough to be heard above the rain, but was shaking with anger that threatened to overflow. “You were wrong, about _everything_.”

He could guess that meant that something had happened at practice again. “Aomine-kun, I’m sorry, but--”

“I don’t CARE!” He was shouting, and now that he was, he couldn’t stop all his frustration from pouring out. “I don’t CARE that you’re ‘sorry’, it doesn’t fix anything! I’m DONE with Quidditch, I’m DONE with everyone’s bullshit, and I’M DONE WITH _YOU_.” And with only a moment of hesitation, he turned and started running back to the castle, and didn’t look back.

Kuroko tried to call after him, but no words left and he just ended up standing there in the rain. He may have been crying, but his face was too wet from the rain for him to be sure, and he couldn’t seem to move from his spot.

In the Great Hall, Kagami was impatiently waiting for dinner to start, when he saw Aomine burst into the hall. Usually he would be followed by Kuroko, and then the two of them would sit at the Gryffindor table. But this time, Aomine was alone, and went to sit at the Slytherin table, looking like he was ready to kill the next person who looked at him funny.

Kagami might not have been too worried usually -- this did happen occasionally -- but for some reason he felt uneasy, and his instincts were telling him that he needed to go find Kuroko. So he walked out the way Aomine had came, heading down towards the Quidditch pitch… and his instincts had been right. Kuroko was alone in the rain, standing still like a statue, with empty eyes. “...Kuroko?” he said cautiously when he was close enough to be heard. “What happened? Are you okay?”

It took Kuroko a moment to register Kagami talking to him. “I... Aomine-kun...” He was having trouble getting the words out, a broken sob leaving him instead.

Kagami panicked -- he had no idea how to handle people crying, he was no good with that -- but then his brain put two and two together, and he got angry instead. He was good at getting angry. “What did that bastard do? Do I have to go beat his ass?”

“He doesn’t want to be my friend anymore,” Kuroko finally managed to say, looking at the ground to try and hide his face from Kagami.

Kagami wanted to go punch Aomine in the face and ask him why the _hell_ he would say something like that to Kuroko. Because as much as Kagami couldn’t stand the guy; he had already accepted that he and Kuroko were pretty much inseparable, and the idea of that changing… made no sense. But seeing Kuroko standing there crying stopped the words dead in his throat, and instead he took a deep breath to calm himself, stepped forward, and slowly wrapped his arms around Kuroko. In the process, he also pulled his wand out of his pocket and cast an umbrella charm over them, to escape the rain.

Kuroko hugged Kagami back tightly, not even noticing the lack of rain but he’d probably be grateful for it later when it kept him from catching a cold. “I don’t know how to fix it,” he said quietly after he’d finally stopped crying.

Kagami frowned. He wish he had some advice, but as far as he was aware, this had almost come out of the blue, he had no idea what had happened between them. “...I’ll grab some food from the Great Hall for us, and we can talk about it in the dorms, where it’s not raining?” he suggested.

Kuroko nodded and slowly let go of Kagami. “Okay,” he said, letting Kagami lead him back inside.

Meanwhile, in the Great Hall, Aomine was staring at the Gryffindor table, not eating, wondering vaguely if he had maybe fucked up, and also wondering if he had enough energy left in him to care.

Kuroko trailed in behind Kagami, sticking close to try and go unnoticed as Kagami gathered food for them, refusing to look around to see if Aomine was there.

Aomine’s eyes immediately locked onto Kuroko the moment he walked in. He was clinging to Kagami like a little puppy who’d gotten lost in the rain, and Aomine felt too many different levels of shitty about that to bother choosing just one word to describe it. He didn’t realize his wand was in his hand until he noticed the people sitting next to him slowly inching away. He scowled and tore his eyes away from Kuroko, shoving his wand back into his pocket. Why should he care anymore? There was no point.

* * *

It was almost the end of winter break, and Aomine wasn’t happy about it. Especially since his parents were insisting he sort through his pile of old crap in the attic before he went back to school. Of course, it was the night before he had to catch the Hogwarts Express that he finally trudged up the dusty attic stairs, sniffling and having sneezed three times before he even reached the top.

He grumbled indistinctly as he pushed and kicked various _other_ piles of shit aside to get to the corner where his stuff was, annoyed that his parents had refused to help. He stubbed his toe trying to kick something heavy hidden beneath a bunch of books and papers, and swore loudly, wishing he could legally use his wand to set fire to this entire stupid attic.

As he continued trying to move the mysterious heavy thing out of the way, the pile of papers fell away, revealing it to be a large, locked chest. Aomine found himself vaguely curious. Examining the lock, he figured it was old and decrepit enough for him to break, so he kicked it a few times until he heard it crack open.

When he touched the top of the chest, he shivered, and felt suddenly that he shouldn’t open it. But of course, he did, and something came flying out of the chest so quickly that it knocked him backwards before he could get a good look at it.

“What the hell…” Aomine muttered as he got back up to look for whatever just hit him. His gaze fell on the one thing that hadn’t been in the room before he opened the chest, something lying in the shadow of a nearby pile of junk. He stepped towards it slowly, squinting to try to see what it wa --

His heart stopped and he almost lost his balance as he suddenly recognized Kuroko.

“Te--Tetsu?” he whispered, closing the rest of the distance between them and kneeling to get a closer look.

Kuroko was lying on the floor, completely still, his skin drained of all color, his sky-blue hair stained by the pool of blood beneath his head, and his eyes wide open and blank.

Somewhere in Aomine’s mind, he knew that Kuroko was not in his house, that he hadn’t had a reason to be in his house for the past year, that this must be some sort of illusion, or maybe he was asleep --

But he couldn’t stop looking at the eyes. In his mind, he could see Kuroko’s bright blue eyes shining with life, but these eyes were a dull grey, and stared up at him with a glassy gaze. And before he knew it he was checking Kuroko’s pulse, feeling how cold his skin was, hearing the deafening silence in the lack of his breathing, grabbing his shoulders and shaking them and getting no response, and he couldn’t stop his brain from screaming at him _Tetsu’s dead, he’s dead, he’s dead, DEAD, TETSU IS DEAD!_

His eyes burned, and he couldn’t stop the tears from falling -- it had been a year since they’d talked but he still knew Kuroko by heart, could hear his voice, could see his smile, could recall in vivid images and sensations that one time they had been sitting by the lake at sunset and Kuroko had held his hand --

And then he could feel the long hours his clothes had been soaked from the rain as he sat on his bed and, in his mind, tried to rearrange his life so that it still functioned without Kuroko in it, but that had never really worked, had it? Because now here he was, and Kuroko was here before him but also gone for good and he had no idea how he was supposed to deal with this, even if he started his whole life completely from scratch he couldn’t picture it without Kuroko.

He didn’t realize that he had started screaming Kuroko’s name until he heard his parents’ frantic voices beside him suddenly. For one mad second he fought against his father’s hold as he pulled him away from Kuroko, until his mother pulled out her wand and approached Kuroko… and he turned into a rat and then the ears grew and it gained a tophat, as she uttered, “Riddikulus.”

Even after the Boggart was back in the chest, and the lock fully restored and magically reinforced, Aomine couldn’t stop crying. He curled up, hugging his knees to his chest and hiding his face, and just hoped maybe he’d run out of tears soon. He was vaguely aware of his mother explaining everything, reaffirming over and over again that _no, that wasn’t real, Kuroko wasn’t dead, you’re going to be okay, Daiki._

He spent the rest of the night lying wide awake in his bed. He hadn’t been this anxious to get on board the Hogwarts Express since his first year, but this time he wasn’t exactly excited -- just desperate to see Kuroko walking around, breathing, with life and color in his eyes. And because he couldn’t sleep, he had all the time in the world to think about what it meant, that even after everything they’d been through, even after pushing Kuroko away, Aomine’s worst fear was losing him.

* * *

 

Kuroko found Kagami at the train station and they started towards platform 9 ¾ together. They exchanged conversation about their breaks as they boarded the Hogwarts Express, and talked about which classes they were looking forward to the least.

Kuroko spotted Aomine, but quickly looked away and continued talking to Kagami about potions class. It had been about a year since they had stopped talking, but he still missed Aomine and had to resist the urge to talk to him when he saw him. He was glad he at least had Kagami to help him through it, but he wondered if he was ever going to be able to actually stop caring about Aomine.

Aomine had not stopped thinking about this moment since last night, but when he finally spotted Kuroko on the train, his breath caught in his throat, and he had to bite the inside of his cheek so hard he tasted blood in order to avoid crying in front of all his fellow classmates. He stared while Kuroko and Kagami disappeared into a compartment, and he just stood awkwardly in the aisle several doors down while everyone else was also claiming seats.

He still hadn’t figured out what to say to Kuroko, whether there was anything he could say at this point. But, as the crowd finally died down, Aomine figured it was either do it now, or spend the entire train ride with this hovering over his head. (And he would much rather sleep, considering how he’d been wide awake since last night.) So he trudged over to Kuroko and Kagami’s compartment before he could have second thoughts, and knocked on the door.

Kuroko and Kagami both looked up at the door and, while Kagami’s surprise was a bit more obvious, they were both a little taken aback to see Aomine there. “What the hell are you doing?” Kagami asked when Kuroko got up and opened the door for Aomine. Kuroko didn’t answer, mostly because he wasn’t sure what he was doing.

Aomine’s brain froze up as the door opened. “Um… hi,” he said, meeting Kuroko’s eyes for only a moment before his gaze darted away awkwardly. “Can I, uh. Can I talk to you for a sec, Tetsu?”

Kuroko was a little at a loss for what to do. “...Okay,” he said after a moment, ignoring the muttered “Idiot,” from Kagami.  

“Uh.” Aomine looked to Kagami and then back to Kuroko. “ _Just_ you?”

Kuroko looked at Kagami, who rolled his eyes but got up. He stopped right in front of Aomine before he left though and introduced his fist to Aomine’s jaw. “If I come back here and find him hurt because of you again, the next one will hurt a lot more,” Kagami threatened.

Aomine swore and staggered back half a step. Irritation spiked through him. “Fuck _off_ already, Eyebrows,” he muttered, rubbing his jaw.

“Please don’t be rude to Kagami-kun,” Kuroko spoke up, having already masked his concern for Aomine while the other was busy insulting Kagami.

Aomine turned to Kuroko and opened his mouth to retort, but the sight of Kuroko’s face stole the words from him and he just sort of stood there in silent defeat.

Kagami shot him a smug smile before walking out to go say hi to Tatsuya, leaving Aomine and Kuroko alone.

Aomine stepped into the compartment, shut the door behind him, and sat down. “I’m… not sure where to start,” he admitted, mostly looking at his shoes, because Kuroko’s eyes still made him kind of want to cry.

“Why you’re suddenly talking to me would probably be a good place to start,” Kuroko replied, looking out the window instead of at Aomine.

Aomine took a deep breath and just… started talking. “You know… you know, Boggarts, right, I always thought they were kinda funny?” he said with a nervous laugh. “Just. A giant joke, a really funny prank to pull on someone, I don’t know. But…” He paused, and his leg shook up and down as he continued. “Last night, there was one of them in my attic, and… um. It… it turned into… you.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “You… dead.”

Kuroko wasn’t sure what to say to that. He was quiet for a long time before he spoke up. “I had an exam with one last year. You weren’t dead, but you were turning your back on me. So, I guess we’re both more afraid of losing each other than anything else.” Which did broach the question of why they hadn’t talked to each other in about a year.

Aomine felt the tears falling against his will, so he laughed. It didn’t help as much as he’d hoped it would. “That’s… fucking stupid,” he said, running a hand through his hair. “That’s just… I’m so fucking _stupid_.”

Kuroko glanced over at him, and felt it was a little harder to breathe when he saw Aomine’s tears. He moved so that he was sitting next to him and gently wiped them away, ignoring the fact that he could feel his own rolling down his face.

Aomine froze for a moment at Kuroko’s touch, looked up at him, looked right into those eyes… and bent to hide his face in Kuroko’s shoulder instead. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. “I’m sorry I had to see you dead before I realized what you mean to me.”

Kuroko ran his fingers through Aomine's hair and held him close. “It’s okay, just please promise it won’t happen again. I don’t think I can handle losing you like that a second time.”

“Never again,” Aomine said, reaching out to wrap an arm around Kuroko’s waist and pull him even closer, deeply relieved to be breathing in his familiar scent and feeling the warmth of his very not-dead body. “I won’t let you go, never again.”

Kuroko nodded, still running fingers through Aomine’s hair and reminding himself over and over again that it wasn’t a dream. That he was really getting Aomine back.

And that was how Kagami found them. “Oh, for fuck’s sake, can’t I leave you two alone for five minutes without this turning into a romantic drama?” he asked.

“Shut your damn mouth, Eyebrows,” Aomine said, not bothering to look up, his voice slightly muffled by Kuroko’s shoulder.

“Did I hear romantic drama?” Takao said, poking his head out of another train compartment and looking at Aomine and Kuroko. “Oh thank God, I was about to lose three chocolate frogs over you guys not making up.”

“Son of a bitch,” Aomine muttered, reluctantly accepting that perhaps the moment was over for now. He tried to surreptitiously wipe his eyes with his sleeves before he lifted his head. “Do you assholes have nothing better to do?”

“I mean, I was planning on making out with my boyfriend, but I don’t have candy staked on him right now,” Takao said. An embarrassed “Shut up, nanodayo!” from Midorima could be heard from inside Takao’s compartment.

Kuroko was getting progressively more irritated with the interruptions, but none of the others seemed to be noticing that.

Aomine was just about ready to get up and return the punch Kagami had thrown earlier… to Takao. “Well that’s what you get for making stupid fucking bets. Go choke on your damn chocolate frogs, dumbass.”

“That’s so rude Aho-chan!” Takao protested, feigning hurt. Kagami let out a laugh at the nickname.

Aomine glared. “Okay, I changed my mind. Why don’t you go choke on Midorima’s dick instead?”

“Whaaa? But I did that yesterday,” Takao said with a grin.

“All of you are very lucky that we are not allowed to use magic yet,” Kuroko whispered.

Aomine grinned. “Oh come on, a jinx or two wouldn’t hurt, right? I won’t tell if you don’t,” he said just as softly.

“How very Slytherin of you,” Kuroko said, but there was a tiny smirk on his face that could rival Akashi’s. Maybe the hat had been wrong in his placement.

Kagami groaned. “Alright now they’re whispering to each other, this is getting too sappy for me.” He turned and walked away. “Tatsuya, I’m staying with you.”

“So, does this mean that Tet-chan and Aho-chan are together now?” Takao asked, ignoring Midorima telling him that it was none of their business. If Midorima didn’t want to know too he would have pulled Takao back into their compartment by then.

“Let me guess, more chocolate frog bets?” Aomine said, rolling his eyes and ignoring the question.

“Nah, I lost that one two years ago. I’m asking because I want my friends to be happy,” Takao said with a bright smile.

“I don’t fucking believe you,” Aomine deadpanned. “Not even a litt--”

Kuroko interrupted him with a quick kiss. “Is that an adequate answer?”

Aomine was surprised -- very pleasantly so. “Hmm, I don’t know. Let’s be extra sure.” He smiled and gently grabbed Kuroko’s chin and leaned in for another kiss, completely disregarding the intruders for the moment as Kuroko kissed him back.

Takao grinned and backed out of the compartment, shutting the door behind him. “Shin-chan, you owe me seven liquorice wands.”


End file.
